Written by Habsterix, AllHabs.net
PENTICTON, BC. — Ever watch a hockey game and smile for no apparent reasons listening to the play-by-play announcer? Then it hits you when you realize that the name of a player made you think of something funny? Here’s a list of the Top 35 names of current NHL players and coaches likely to draw a smile on your face:
- Gustav Nyquist (DET): For itchy stuffy nose
- Ben Maxwell (ANA): Coffee’s on the house
- Marc-Andre Bourdon (PHI): Better known as Bumble-bee
- Carl Klingberg (WIN): Use Steve Downie for static
- Mike Commodore (DET): Should be wearing #64
- Robert Bortuzzo (PIT): Todd Bertuzzi’s relative, changed his name out of shame.
- Paul Postma (WIN): Missing an “n”?
- Cade Fairchild (STL): As opposed to unfair?
- Michal Repik (FLO): When you need a second chance
- Jake Dowell (DAL): Watching him move is having a Dowell movement
- Casey Wellman (MIN): Well what?
- Brett Sterling (STL): Silver lining
- Brandon Saad (CHI): As opposed to Haappy
- Brandon Yip (COL): Yuuuuuup!Storage Wars’ fan
- Dan Hinote (COL): The guy sure can sing
- Mattias Ritola (TBL): Isn’t that a cough medicine?
- Ben Lovejoy (PIT): Need I say more?
- Cody Bass (CBJ): Something fishy about him
- Nicklas Grossman (DAL): Wonder what he did to deserve that name…
- Andreas Nodl (CAR): Thow him on the wall and see if he sticks
- Trevor Lewis (LAK): What’ you talkin’ about?
- Kyle Clifford (LAK): The big red dog (those with kids will understand)
- Jakub Kindl (DET): Smaller than Wood
- Trevor Daley (DAL): More frequent than Kevin Weeks
- Aaron Rome (VAN): Wasn’t built in a day
- Joey Crabb (TOR): Wonder where he got those from
- Nikita Nikitin (CBJ): Addictive
- T.J. Oshie (STL): Would love to play with Mario
- Dustin Byfuglien (WIN): How do they get Bufflin out of that?
- Jeff Skinner (CAR): Who doesn’t think of The Simpsons?
- Grant Clitsome (CBJ): Need I say more?
- Clayton Stoner (MIN): Cheech and Chong’s favorite player
- Mike Yeo (MIN): Yeo, pick up the phone! Wazzup!
- Ken Hitchcock (STL): The Itchy and Scratchy show
- Mike Babcock (DET): That’s a “b”, not a “d”
So the next time you watch NHL hockey, try not to laugh too much. People around you may not understand… unless you refer them to this article. Do you know any that should be on this list? Post them in the comments’ section and we’ll all laugh together.
You forget R.J. Umberger :)
Some other names :
R.J. Umberger
Randy Cunneyworth(less)
Alex Auld
Jonathan Quick
Good ones Max. :)
Pokey Reddick
Jonathan Quick & Viktor Fasth (Speedy goalies)
Ryan Getzlaf (Gets Laugh)
Shawn Horcoff (Skank with a scratchy throat)
Jordin Tootoo (Ballerina?)
Charlie Coyle (goes in circles)
Cal Clutterbuck (A deer with too much stuff?)
Daniel Bang (POW!)
Darroll Powe (BANG!)
Michael Grabner (should keep his hands to himself)
Mark Streit and Brian Strait (they aren’t gay)
Tomas Hickey (what’s that on your neck?)
Tanner Glass (Tinted)
Joffrey Lupul (found a loophole)
Nik Kulemin (is a Cool Lemon)
Jay Beagle (can be a little snoopy)
Some guys who are on the perfect team for their name.
Cam Fowler (The Ducks)
Dwight King (The Kings)
Drew Shore (Florida)
You forgot about the Finnish players. No Tukka Rask or Pekka Rinne?? Tsk… tsk…tsk….
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